Christmas 2013

Merry Christmas from the Simmons Family! 

2013 has been another crazy year for our family, full of ups and downs and successes and disappointments. But as crazy as the end of 2013 has been, I have to remind myself that we are more blessed than most (in spite of all the crap). Christmas is a reminder about how truly blessed we are.

Not bad for what I thought would be a Pinterest fail. 

Polar Express Day at school! And a good excuse to get the girls cute matching Christmas PJs. 

Waiting to see the Big Guy....

And this is the nonsense that I pay $25 for. Argh! 

Yelling at my mom during sugar cookie making. She's such a gentle little thing. 

Sugar Cookie Palooza '13 with the coolest kids in Kansas! (Natalie and Abby are missing of course, but they are included in the "cool kids club.")

Chewing on vintage toys, and Uncle Rob's bell

Can't. Hardly. Stand. It. 

SANTA CAME!!!!

A little apprehensive. As well she should be since she acted a holy terror about 364 days last year. She pulled it together on Christmas Eve though. :-)

Love my girls! 

We don't need no stinkin' turkey!

Pleased with what the big man brought her!

Safety first..

Even though I know how blessed we are, and have a lot to be thankful for, (2 beautiful, healthy girls, a roof over our heads, not knowing the pangs of hunger, etc.) this....

...still hits me like a ton of bricks and makes the holidays hard to bear. This was our third Christmas without Rob and the pain caused by his absence is just as intense as it was that first Christmas. Our family has welcomed two new little girls since his death, and Natalie and Abby will never get to experience their Uncle Rob or take advantage of his inability to tell them no by having him build a snowman or pull them around the yard on a sled for hours on end. I know life isn't fair. I know I am not special and have no reason to believe that I should be immune to the pains of this world. Yet I still want to scream at the top of my lungs at the injustice of his absence. I want to scream that Emma doesn't remember him and only knows that I miss him. But most of all, I want him here. Which deep down I know is selfish. Because if I truly believe what my faith teaches me, then I have to believe he is in a much better place than we are. I just really miss him...we all do.